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Ask Husi: Law on "murder"

By squigs (Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 09:08:20 AM EST) (all tags)

I knocked on a random door, and then used a baseball bat to bash the brains out of the person who answered it. I then used a chainsaw to dismember him.

Now, a friend of mine with a little legal training tells me that this is murder and the possible penalty is life imprisonment.

Is this true? Is there any wiggle room considering I'm a first time offender, and the fact that he didn't ask me to stop? I'm a busy person, and being locked away for life would be rather inconvenient.

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Ask Husi: Law on "murder" | 11 comments (11 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback

How good a lawyer can you afford ? by Phage (4.00 / 1) #1 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 09:10:36 AM EST

The Czar of Accounting. No Nit Too Small To Pick

Quite a lot. by squigs (4.00 / 1) #2 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 09:14:29 AM EST

But I thought the "I'm stupidly rich" defence only applied under US law.

[ Parent ]

Use of a baseball bat . . . by Christopher Robin was Murdered (4.00 / 5) #3 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 09:42:40 AM EST

Brings this offense under US jurisdiction.

[ Parent ]

: Or Japan by debacle (4.00 / 1) #9 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 11:31:43 AM EST

But I don't think these kinds of things make it to court over there. It's assumed you've already disemboweled yourself.
"I'm very responsive to certain stimuli, and pain is pretty much at the top of that list." - BadDoggie

[ Parent ]

Easy peasy by ad hoc (2.00 / 0) #4 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 09:48:08 AM EST

Say it's all hypothetical.
--
Hypocrisy is the resin that holds the plywood of society together

Was the person in question a suspected terrorist? by Herring (4.00 / 2) #5 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 09:48:17 AM EST

Posession of a beard, non-white skin, a Koran, a book by Chomsky by the alleged victim will all count in your favour.

You can't outlaw rabbits! They'll just go underground - Milton Jones

Mandatory life imprisonment. by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #6 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 09:59:24 AM EST

I'm sure you'll be fine.

Wear your best suit, talk posh and use your Masonic connections and you'll be fine.

You are a Freemason, aren't you?

I wouldn't worry by TPD (2.00 / 0) #7 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 10:12:31 AM EST

I suspect this is one of those Antiquated laws like having to practice Archery on Sunday, your friend is most likely winding you up.

In any case I'm sure the police have far better things to be doing than arresting everyone who "murders" somebody.

Rock Hard Abs are just a sw-sw-swivel away!

Do you play a lot of GTA? by georgeha (4.00 / 1) #8 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 10:12:39 AM EST

That stuff can really warp minds and make killers out of the nicest people.

Well done! by ambrosen (2.00 / 0) #10 Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 01:08:37 PM EST

It's about time someone took a stand against these wishy-washy liberals who insist that all our hard-earned rights are eroded in the name of "Political Correctness". If they stop our right to murder innocent strangers in the comfort of our own homes, then they'll stop us watching My Neighbour's a Darky next, and then who knows what they'll do. Probably something fascist like making it illegal to park in front of the A&E department when you go into town to do your shopping.

I blame the Labour nanny state personally. The Labour party all went downhill when they got rid of that Enoch Powell. He told them to send them all home and look what they did to him. Gord bless Churchill. He's the only man who can save us now. Heaven knows he wasn't above a little murdering and cavorting with mass murderers and rightly so. If it weren't for that, you'd be speaking German now. Of course, I can't say that living under the Aryan race would be a bad thing, but if you have to speak German, count me out. Even if they don't have speed limits on their motorways. Anyway, I bet they string you up for it, and then send a load of paedos to Vietnam on a fun filled holiday before feeding my children to them while they give asylum seekers free champagne, and hugging children who wear hoodies.

This country's gone to the dogs, and if I know one thing, it's that it's upstanding folk like you or me who do all the work to save it, and what thanks do we get. Life in prison. Like we're common criminals.

In any sane society you'd be a free man by nebbish (2.00 / 0) #11 Thu Nov 16, 2006 at 06:30:02 AM EST

It's political correctness gone mad. We're going to hell in a handcart.

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It's political correctness gone mad!

Ask Husi: Law on "murder" | 11 comments (11 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback


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